When you are facing redundancy it can be devastating and totally knock you sideways. It can leave you feeling lost, fearful and hopeless. In fact, job loss has been likened to the grief process and when experienced, the individual goes through similar symptoms as someone who has suffered loss.
The longer you have been in a job, it can often be more difficult emotionally. You may have formed strong emotional attachments with colleagues and leaving this can be heartbreaking.
You not only have to contend with the loss of emotional attachments, there is also a feeling of insecurity as you start to worry about how you are going to cope financially.
How you respond to job loss will determine how easily or not you adapt. You can either deny it or accept it. Denying it will not get you anywhere and will only leave you feeling down, demotivated and hopeless. Whereas responding to it optimistically will help you to feel hopeful and be more open to identifying the opportunities that exist for you.
The following 4 Ds of job loss will help you understand why you feel the way you do and help you to develop a mindset to cope with your situation.
Devastation
When you get the news that your role is to be made redundant it feels devastating if this is not what you want or is totally unexpected. Suddenly your sense of personal control is threatened, leaving you feeling insecure and fearful for the future.
We like to be in control of our futures, we like to know what is round the corner and when we don't we become fearful and stressed. When you feel this way it is easy to imagine the worst possible outcome. A client of mine faced the possibility of redundancy when she had to reapply for her role as the number of positions were being reduced.
The worst imaginable thought for her was that she would be made homeless. She wouldn't get the job and she wouldn't be able to pay her mortgage. Her house would then be repossessed and she would end up on the streets with nowhere to live.
Depression
When you feel this way and are worrying about the outcome, it makes you stressed and anxious. The more you ruminate over it and repeat the story in your mind, the worst it becomes and the larger the problem appears to be. The physiological effects start to manifest by way of stress and the associated symptoms.
My client was having sleepless nights, her skin had become blotchy, her scalp became dry and flaky and she was eating emotionally, consuming a lot of junk foods for comfort.
She had to reapply for her job but because she was so stressed out, she was unable to think rationally. She convinced herself that she would fail the interview and that she would not get a role.
Decision
You need to make a choice as to how you respond to losing your job. If you are finding it difficult to adjust, get some support. Find out what support your organisation can give you. If they are unable to offer you support, find support for yourself.
Research shows that coaching helps individuals who are facing job loss to view their situations rationally, improve their self-confidence and view their circumstances clearly. This enables them to identify opportunities and to be optimistic and hopeful about their future careers.
List all your concerns about this change and what you believe that the impact could be. For each item on the list, look at how rational your beliefs are. How realistic is it that what you believe will actually happen? Where is the evidence to support that belief? What can you do to minimise it happening?
Now list all of the possible opportunities that could arise as a result of this change. Could this be an opportunity to pursue something that you have always wanted to do? Could this be an opportunity for you to take control of your career? Could it be an opportunity for you to start your own business? Or could it even be an opportunity for you to get out of a toxic environment, learn something new and to do something that you'll love?
Denial or acceptance, what do you decide?
Development
Once you have identified the possible opportunities, start exploring them and finding out what it will take to make them happen.
What do you really want to do and what do you need to put it in place?
If you are optimistic about this change, you will feel less stressed, less anxious and be hopeful for the future.
My client was able to view her situation more rationally once the threat to her sense of personal control had been minimised. No longer having thoughts of being made homeless, she didn't feel so stressed and anxious and was able to sleep better.
She was able to prepare for the interview and approach it feeling more confident and she got the job.
Before she came for coaching, people kept telling her that she had nothing to worry about and that she was good at what she did and would get the job. They told her to think positive but this only made her feel worse.
Because she believed that she was going to be made homeless, no matter how many times they told her it would be OK or no matter how many times she told herself to think positive, she just felt more anxious about the situation.
It was only when she was able to dispute her irrational beliefs, with supporting evidence that she was able to believe that she would not be made homeless.
Develop an optimistic outlook and you will be able to see opportunities. There are always opportunities but you have to be open to see them.
Originally Published on LinkedIn