Through my work coaching introverted women leaders, there are some common reasons that I see that hinder their promotions to senior leadership. They are capable of doing the role, but they are not positioning themselves for it.
There are a number of things that would be beneficial for them to do BEFORE they apply for the role. Some of these require positioning themselves for it for a long time before they even walk into the interview room. By positioning themselves, and taking the necessary steps, they put themselves in a better position to secure a senior leadership role.
Focused consistent action gets results, and if you want to get a senior leadership position, being intentional and taking the necessary action will get you there.
Here are some of the common reasons that I come across as to why introverted women are not getting senior leadership promotions, and one reason that commonly underpins them all.
Not being visible
You may have heard me talk about the research that shows that extraverted employees get more opportunities at work because their performance is more visible. Many introverted leaders don’t automatically go out of their way to raise their visibility and profile. As such, they may get overlooked and not considered when opportunities arise.
Many think that their work will speak for itself and in an ideal world, this would be the case. However, we do not live in an ideal world, and those who you need to be visible to may not get to know about you if you do not position yourself for it.
You do not have to be the loudest in the room to be visible, but you do need to be seen and heard, and you do need to have presence. I have a saying that goes ‘You don’t need to be loud to stand out as a leader, but you do need to have presence’.
Visibility enhances your credibility and influence and helps with building relationships. Things that help to increase visibility include getting involved with initiatives, public speaking, demonstrating your thought leadership, and increasing your presence in those spaces where you wouldn’t ordinarily go (but need to), to be seen.
I once had a coaching client who as head of service, wanted to go to the next level. Feedback had been that she was not visible to the executive team. Through our working together, she developed a plan that got her before the executive team on regular occasions, as well as increasing her visibility with the wider organisation and senior stakeholders.
Not defining their personal brand
Jeff Bezos, founder of Amazon is said to be known for saying ‘Your brand is what people say about you when you’re not in the room’. For many introverts who are not getting senior leadership promotions, what people are saying about them when they are not in the room, doesn’t align with what they want to be known for. Some don’t even have a clue what people say about them when they are not in the room.
Your personal brand includes who you are, what you stand for, and the value that you add. And it is not just what people say and think about you, it’s also what they see, read, and hear about you as well.
Some introverts try to put on a persona and act extraverted. This can come across as inauthentic and be damaging for their personal brand. Plus, trying to be someone that you are not can be draining, and eventually take its toll, chipping away at your self-confidence and self-belief.
By developing your personal brand, you can influence the perception other people have of you. It helps you to increase engagement, and to be more influential and impactful as a leader. It also helps you to position yourself for promotion or your next move.
Define your personal brand. Align yourself to your values and know what you stand for, be authentic, utilise your strengths, and get feedback from others so that you know what people say about you when you are not in the room. If what they say is not what you want them to say, what can you do about it?
Not self-promoting
This goes hand in hand with visibility because self-promotion enables you to be visible. Not only that, but it also helps you to demonstrate your successes, achievements, and the difference that you make.
Self-promotion does not come naturally to many introverts. Introverts typically are not bothered about being in the spotlight, whereas self-promotion does require putting some light on yourself. Also, for many, self-promotion can feel self-centred and like bragging or boasting.
However, you can self-promote in ways that feel authentic and that don’t feel self-centred. Rather than viewing it as self-promotion, view it as letting others know about the difference you have made and the impact that what you have done has had.
Putting the spotlight on the outcomes and the difference made, takes it off yourself and does not feel as uncomfortable. But you still need to get across that the outcome was as a result of the action that you took.
I have had many coaching clients who have come to me for coaching after being unsuccessful at senior leadership promotions where feedback has been that they have not sold themselves.
One in particular was told that they did not demonstrate that they could perform at that level. They had talked a lot about the ‘we’ as in the teams' achievements but had not articulated the role that they specifically played.
Whilst it is good to acknowledge the team effort, remember to make it known what successes and achievements were due to your leadership and the part that you played.
Not developing and utilising their network
There have been various research studies that demonstrate the importance of networking for career success. But in my work, I come across many introverted women who are not aware of the impact that networking can make in opening doors of opportunities for them.
Networking is about connecting with others and building relationships. By developing connections and relationships, you strengthen your circle of influence. As you position yourself for senior leadership promotion, networking is a tool that can support you with this.
Many introverts don’t like networking because it is draining. Being in networking environments can be overstimulating. When feeling overstimulated, you are less likely to want to engage in small talk with others and more likely to want to retreat somewhere on your own to recharge.
Introverts typically don’t like ‘working the room’ and making small talk with lots of people, preferring depth of conversation over quantity. You do not have to work the room and speak to lots of different people. Identify those you want to connect with and have fewer, but more meaningful conversations with them.
And it’s not just in-person events where you can network. LinkedIn is a great platform to grow and develop your network. One coaching client who hated networking and didn’t use LinkedIn, started to use it after I told her the benefits of using it and encouraged her to do so.
She reconnected with people whom she had previously met and arranged to have coffee with them (you can do this face-to-face or virtually). One such encounter led to her securing a Chief Operating Officer role.
Not demonstrating their strategic thinking skills or thinking that they are not strategic enough
The shift to senior leadership requires you to have more of a strategic outlook. I often see introverted women leaders who have a strategic outlook, but they don’t articulate this, or they let other people take credit for their ideas.
Or they tell themselves that they are not strategic enough. One coaching client didn’t put herself forward for a promotion because she compared herself to her extraverted colleague (who was also vying for the promotion) who spoke a lot and talked a good talk. She put herself down thinking that she was not as good as him.
When we unpicked things, she recognised that often there was not a lot of substance to what her colleague put forward. She realised that she WAS actually strategic in her thinking AND she had evidence of this by way of feedback from her line manager.
But comparing herself to her colleague whom she thought was better than her and putting herself down in the process, it made her doubt herself and think that she was not good enough.
When going for senior leadership promotions, people often trip themselves up by getting frantic about what strategic thinking means. Do not make the mistake (as many do) of looking at the words ‘strategic thinking’ as some unobtainable abstract concept, letting it put you off.
Strategic thinking skills involve the ability to analyse complex situations, anticipate future trends, and develop long-term plans to achieve goals. When you break it down to what it actually means (like my client mentioned), you will probably find that it is a skill you already possess.
And don’t compare yourself to others and put yourself down in the process. Just because someone talks a good talk, it doesn’t automatically mean that they walk a good walk.
The number one factor underpinning all of the above
There is one factor that I see time and time again that underpins all of the reasons mentioned above. It is having self-limiting beliefs. They regularly experience imposter syndrome and doubt themselves which leads to a lack of self-confidence.
Usually at the root of this is a childhood experience or early career experience where they have been made to feel like they are not good enough. Or they have been put on a pedestal and feel that they are unable to live up to expectations of them.
Examples include the coaching client who, at the age of 12 ran home happy from school because she got a B in an exam. Only to be greeted by her father demanding to know why it was a B and not an A.
Or the client who, being the brightest in the family, had high expectations of what she should achieve placed on her by family members. Something that continues to this day. As a result, she continually strived for perfection and was very critical of herself and her team, setting unattainable standards.
Or the client who, when starting in her career was ridiculed because of her accent (despite being bilingual) thought that the issue was her, rather than seeing the situation for what it was. Which was racism.
Neither of these coaching clients realised what was at the root of their lack of belief in themselves and their abilities. Despite doing well in their leadership careers, they continually experienced imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and lacked self-confidence.
Their outward appearance looked like they were successful, but the inner turmoil they experienced was stressful and put a lot of pressure on them.
Addressing the root issue was freeing for them. Being free from the chains that bound them mentally gave them a feeling of inner peace and a belief in themselves like never before, making them unstoppable in pursuit of their senior leadership careers. It also had a positive impact on their personal lives.
If you want to become unstoppable in pursuit of your senior leadership career but imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and a lack of self-confidence hold you back, join me for my free, live 5 Day Mind Cleanse challenge from 15-19 April 2024.
You will join me for 30 minutes a day each day for 5 days where I will take you through the day's challenge, providing you with guidance and answering your questions. If you can't make the live calls, don't worry, you can watch them on replay. Plus, you will also get access to a private, pop-up LinkedIn group where you can also get support.
"Carol's challenge really hit home because it forced me to deal with the fact that I'm holding back myself."
Find out more and join the 5 Day Mind Cleanse challenge here.
If you want to get a senior leadership promotion, start positioning yourself for it way before you even fill out an application for the role and keep evidence of your successes and achievements along the way.
What are you doing (or have you done) to position yourself for your next promotion?
First published on LinkedIn.
If you are an introverted woman and a senior leader and want to increase your confidence, influence and impact, take my free assessment and get a report identifying areas to develop. You can take the assessment here.