This is for leaders at all levels in organisations:
People who are introverted are often told that they should speak up more in meetings. If they don’t speak a lot in meetings, this is often misunderstood by people who do not fully understand what being introverted means.
It doesn’t mean that they haven’t got anything to say, it might be just that they prefer to speak when they have something of value to add to the conversation. Not wanting to speak just for the sake of speaking.
Introverts have a preference for thinking and processing their thoughts before speaking. So, the silence you get from them in a meeting, may just be them pulling their thoughts together to give a carefully considered response.
Or, if there is a lot of talk going on in meetings, and lots of people speaking at once, sitting in that environment for a long time with all that external activity can be overstimulating for someone who is introverted. This can leave them feeling drained and exhausted, and less likely to want to engage.
Just because someone speaks a lot in meetings, it doesn’t automatically mean that they are adding value to the conversation. They might simply be thinking out loud and processing their thoughts whilst they speak. They could be waffling or speaking just for the sake of speaking.
When you single out someone who is introverted for not speaking up enough in meetings, you fail to appreciate the diversity of thinking styles and the value that they have to offer. If they’ve been fed misconceptions about introversion over the years, they may not realise that how they process information is perfectly ok. Telling them to speak up more in meetings, could lead to them doubting themselves, making it harder for them to do so.
If someone is shy, or lacks the confidence to speak up in meetings, then that is a different matter. As their leader, support them with their development, so that they develop the confidence to speak up. Do not confuse those situations with introversion. People who are extroverted can be shy and lack confidence speaking up in meetings too.
As leaders of people, you would do good to understand the differences amongst your people and appreciate the value in those differences. The way that a lot of meetings are held, doesn’t allow introverts to make their best contribution.
When carrying out research for my book, one study I came across suggested that if businesses were measured by their performance at meetings, many of them would go out of business. This is something that I am prone to agree with.
If you are Chairing or facilitating a meeting, it is your responsibility to ensure that they are conducted fairly. As well as making sure that everyone has an opportunity to contribute and that their contribution is valued. This may mean rethinking the way that meetings in your organisation are conducted.
Be aware of the dynamics in your meetings. Rather than singling out your introverted team members and telling them they need to speak more, provide a psychologically safe environment where people feel that they can speak up according to their thinking style without judgement. When people feel like they are in a psychologically safe environment, they make more of a contribution.
We need both the voices of the extroverts and the introverts at the table. The thoughtful reflections and carefully considered responses of introverts, alongside the quick and off the cuff responses of extroverts, can make for good, balanced ideas and decisions. Why not tap into this dynamic and hold meetings in a way that gives everyone the opportunity to give their best contribution.
Does your organisation create an environment that gives space for introverts to speak up in meetings in their preferred way? Let me know in the comments below.
First published on LinkedIn.
If you are an introverted woman and a senior leader and want to increase your confidence, influence and impact, take my free assessment and get a report identifying areas to develop. You can take the assessment here.