When I was younger, I never realised that my quietness and reflective thinking style wasn’t because I was shy, or because I lacked confidence. Like many other introverted women, I had bought into the misconceptions around introversion and this had shaped my perception of myself. I used to wish I could just blurt profound things out on the spot.
Because I was quiet, I didn’t think I could be influential. But as I got to know and understand myself and my strengths, and understand introversion, I realised I did not need to be loud and gregarious to have influence. I could quietly influence in my own, authentic way.
As a leader, you need to be influential if you are to have impact, and just because someone is appointed leader, it doesn’t automatically mean they are able to influence. As a leader being influential is essential to get buy in to your vision and the direction you want to take the organisation or department.
As senior leaders, many of my clients are introverted women who are often in meetings full of extroverted men. For them it is imperative that their voice is heard above the noise. I coach them to hold their own and to have the influence and impact they want.
Due to misconceptions around introversion, many introverted leaders do not consider their introverted characteristics as strengths. Because they do not align with the dominant group type, many view them as weaknesses. But once they start to see them as strengths, they find it empowering. And once they realise how they can utilise these strengths to be more influential, it is transformative for them.
Here are 3 typical characteristics associated with introverts and how you can utilise them as strengths to be more influential.
3. Be the calm in the storm
I was never one to ‘throw my toys out of the pram’ and there were times in my leadership career where my calm persona was mistaken for not caring. This is something that many of the introverted women leaders I coach experience too.
But behind that quiet calm there was a passion. A passion for what I did which was demonstrated through my commitment and dedication to my work. I just didn’t express this in a loud manner the way that some people did.
In moments of crisis, my calm, quiet nature enabled me to keep my head above water when around me people were stressed and panicking. My calm approach enabled us to get through many a crisis situation.
You too can use your still persona to bring about peace, calm and order. Something that I am sure is welcomed during the current climate. When everyone is panicking, step in to bring about order and control.
Listen and observe
Introverts are well known for their listening skills, and for thinking and reflecting before offering a well thought through opinion. Have you come to believe that you are unable to make valuable contributions because you don’t come up with your best responses when put on the spot? If so, play to your thinking and reflective strength and the fact your responses are measured and well thought through.
We learn a lot about people through observation. Take what you learn through observing and use it to modify your responses. Understanding the way that the people around you react to differing situations, use that awareness to inform your approach in helping them to see your point of view.
People like to feel listened to which is key to building trust. You are more likely to have influence if people trust you. Listen to understand so you can respond appropriately. Listening (as opposed to just hearing) makes it easier for you to ‘enter the world’ of those you want to influence, and gain understanding from their perspective. Having that understanding makes it easier to address their concerns, and to influence.
Let your quiet presence be felt
When discussions get intense, it is often the loudest ones whose voices get heard and the loudness of the voices may make the conversation feel heated. Rather than thinking your voice won’t be heard over the noise, let your presence be felt and use the strength of your quietness to rise above it.
Interject and adopt a strong, firm, and assertive tone, and maintain it when others try to interrupt. It is hard for someone to continue shouting when you don’t shout back.
Being introverted does not mean that you do not have a voice, and as a leader, it is important your voice is heard over the noise if you are to have influence.
Do not think that because you are introverted you have less influence than your extroverted colleagues. The characteristics you may have tried to suppress could actually be the strength you use to be a sphere of influence and make the impact you want to make.
How do you utilise your introverted strengths to influence? Or have misconceptions about introversion shaped the way you view them, so you don’t view them as strengths? Please let me know below.
Originally published on LinkedIn.
If you are an introverted woman and a senior leader and want to increase your confidence, influence and impact, take my free assessment and get a report identifying areas to develop. You can take the assessment here.
