Discouragement if not managed is a powerful, negatively impacting emotion. If left to fester it can lead to despondency, leaving you feeling hopeless about ever getting the results you want.
Once you get to a place of despondency it can be a struggle for you to turn things around. If you are feeling discouraged or even despondent, if left to fester, it can affect your self belief, causing you to doubt yourself and your ability.
When I was a child my mother used to say ‘every disappointment is for a reason’ and whilst I never really knew what she meant back then, I now know that there is a lot we can learn when we experience disappointment in our careers and businesses.
What can you learn from your disappointments?
If we get knocked back from a promotion, we can get feedback, reflect on it and gain an understanding of what we need to do differently next time. If we are disappointed that we are not getting the clients we need for our business, we can take a good honest look at whether we are doing the right marketing activities, whether we are taking focused, consistent action, or whether we’re procrastinating or letting distractions steal our attention.
If we don’t look at the reason why things turned out the way they did, learn from it and apply the learning, we will continually do the same thing and continue getting disappointed.
Continuous disappointment will leave us feeling discouraged. If left to fester, discouragement can be a powerful, negatively impacting emotion. If we are left feeling discouraged for too long, it can lead to despondency where we lose hope of ever achieving what it is that we want to achieve.
Try this and see if it helps
Once we become despondent and lose hope, it is even more challenging for us to get our mojo back. It is easier to deal with disappointment than despondency. So if you have had a knockback or not got the results that you want, deal with the disappointment rather than let it linger.
If you have had a knock back in your career or business, or have not got the results that you want, here is a simple problem solving exercise that I shared in my High Achieving Women Facebook group that you can use to get to the root cause of the issue which will make it easier for you to identify the solution. If you work or have worked in the corporate world, you may be familiar with it. It is a tool used by teams to identify solutions to problems. It works just as well for individuals using it on their own.
It is called the 5 Whys and you ask yourself why no fewer than 5 times to get to the root cause of the problem. Here are 2 practical examples of how it has been used with clients of mine.
Problem - Failed to get a promotion to a senior management role
Why? Feedback said that I didn't portray that I could perform at such a senior level
Why? I didn't 'sell' myself well at the interview
Why? I don't like self promotion and I am not good at promoting myself
Why? I don't feel comfortable being in the spotlight in that way
Why? Although I really want the role, deep down I don't believe that I am good enough
Solution: Get coaching to help develop self acceptance and self belief
Problem - Didn't get any new clients in the previous month
Why? I didn't have enough consultations
Why? I didn't invite enough people to have a consultation
Why? I didn't do the follow up with people who have expressed an interest, or engage with potential clients and meet new people
Why? I didn't make enough effort and give it the priority it deserves
Why? Even though I need the income, I've become very discouraged and demotivated
Solution: Introduce weekly targets to give a more immediate sense of achievement and reward to help increase motivation and be encouraged
If you have had a disappointment, not got the results you want or have been knocked back, try this exercise to get to the root cause of the issue. Getting to the root cause will make it easier for you to then identify a solution. It is better to deal with disappointments and get to the root cause of the issue as and when they happen, rather than letting a series of continued disappointments linger and lead to despondency.
How do you deal with disappointments in your career or business? What do you do to pick yourself up and get back on track? I would love to know so please share your comments below.
If you're starting a business, or have been in business less than 3 years and disappointment and discouragement are plaguing you because you’re not getting clients and you’re not making money, join my Micro Business Academy and give your business the kick start that it needs.
For 6 months you will have my guidance and support so that you are clear on every aspect of what you need to do to make your business a success. And not only that, challenging you and holding you accountable so that you take focused, consistent action and actually make it happen. Find out more and secure your place on The Micro Business Academy here.